someone owes me an orgasm
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
