It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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