I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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