She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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