I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Vodka?
Forever.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
