Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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