yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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