i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
