just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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