So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
