so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
My ass is underappreciated
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize