I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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