Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
my poor anus
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
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