Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
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