I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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