I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
