You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
