sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
