He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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