At least make sure they are 18
Why
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
