Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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