Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
