Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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