I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Randomize
