How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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