Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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