he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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