Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
