Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
