I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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