I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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