i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Rumble strips road head = magical
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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