No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize