I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
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