I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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