Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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