C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
