Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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