I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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