he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Randomize
