sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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