I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
