Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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