We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
