their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
