Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
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