Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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