is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
