im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
