Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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