Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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