when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Walk of Shame today included voting.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
